What I Wore – A Weekend in Paris

Packing for our weekend in Paris was so hard for lots of reasons. Firstly, I had kept the booking a surprise from Tony – so all the packing had to be done in secret. Secondly, we were only going for two days so it was really hard to choose what to take! Lastly, I knew I had to pack light because lugging a heavy bag on the Eurostar wouldn’t be much fun.

Luckily, the forecast was for dry weather – so I didn’t have to worry about waterproof layers. I opted largely for practicality because I knew we would do a lot of walking – but I still took some things with me that I really love. And so – here’s my weekend in Paris look… weekend in paris clothesStarting at the bottom – I took two pairs of super comfy flats from Dune and they were definitely the right choice because we walked for miles. I teamed them up on the first day with a spotty cropped trousers and super skinny jeans (both Boden) on the second day. I stuck with grey, red, silver and blue as my colours so everything could be mixed and matched. A grey wool Banana Republic blazer-style jacked kept me warm – and I definitely needed it in the spring breeze. A light blue cashmere scarf was also really useful in the wind, and my country garden Notting Hill tote from Pink Lining (where I work) was the perfect travel and sightseeing bag.

I took my favourite dress of the moment, the Jacques Vert petite spot tiered dress – because I love it – and it was absolutely perfect for our evening meal in a very traditional French bistro. I had lots of wine and chocolate that evening – and then we walked to the Eiffel tower. It was the perfect dress for a perfect evening!

I think if I’d have had another day I would have taken another pretty dress for the daytime – but I’ll just have to make sure we stay for longer next time!

paris meal

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Top Tips for Coping with Teething

Teething Milin

It’s taken me ages but I’ve finally got the hang of recognising the early signs of teething. Both Milin and Jasmin take their time when it comes to teeth, and it can take ages for just one of their little pearly whites to come through. But knowing now what’s going on has made the whole sorry process a lot easier to cope with. It’s only taken me three years!

I know that all little ones teethe differently and from different ages, but both of mine were quite late at cutting their first teeth. I can remember kind of not wanting them to come through. It wasn’t just that I didn’t want to see my babies suffer, it was that I didn’t want them to lose their gummy baby smiles. I still miss those gorgeous toothless grins.

We’re going through classic teething signs at the moment and, as usual, I’m exhausted. Jasmin has stopped sleeping through and is instead having restless nights which usually end up with her in our bed. There isn’t any other way to settle her and I just don’t have the energy to be up for hours with her at night.

While she’s not got red cheeks or a temperature, I’ve learnt to recognise that this period of sleepless nights is usually teething-related. Milin went through months of this around the 14 – 17 month mark. Once his teeth came through, he was suddenly sleeping again. I just need to keep telling myself with Jasmin that we’ll get there too!

After the months of broken sleep, they both teethe in a similar way. Their tummies are a little upset, they stop eating, the run temperatures around 38C and they’re generally grouchy. Now that I recognise all of these signs, it is so much easier to cope with them.

I’ve also discovered that one thing I can’t be without when they are both teething is Nelson’s Teetha. I’d never heard of it before having kids and now I know why this company is the UKs number one teething brand. Really, it’s the only thing that calms them down – and given how upset they can be – this is a wonder product in my eyes. The funny thing too is that they both love it so much that even if they’re not teething but they see the other one having it, they want it too!

Teething

And so, I thought I’d round up the things I’ve learnt about teething. I know all babies are different, but here’s the stuff that has made life easier for us.

1. Look out for the signs that are specific to your baby – not all will have red cheeks or fevers, but knowing what the signs are in your little one will help you be prepared.

2. Don’t take their grumpiness personally. They might be miserable for a few days, but it’s not your fault and there isn’t much you can do apart from trying to distract thel.

3. Don’t worry about a balanced diet. When they’re teething, babies might not want to eat or they might want different foods. Don’t try and force them to eat things they don’t want – it’s not worth it. If their gums are sore, it’s fair enough they don’t want to chew.

4. Stock up on Nelsons Teetha Teething Granules. They are a homeopathic remedy specially formulated for the soothing and calming relief of the symptoms of teething. They also come ready dosed in sachets and my kids love tipping the granules into their mouths.*

5. Get early nights where you can. There are going to be some long nights, so it’s worth getting as much pre-midnight sleep time as you can.

6. Give them nappy free time. Both of mine could get a nasty nappy rash with teething but being nappy-free (preferably in the sunshine) definitely helped relieve this.

7. Lastly, good luck. You do get to the other side. Milin’s back molars came when he turned two. We had two bad nights but we gave him loads of Teetha and let him sleep in our bed – and thankfully, we’ve been clear of teething drama since!

 *This is a sponsored post for Nelson’s teetha  teething granules – they contain a 6c homeopathic potency of natural Chamomilla. They cost £5.10 and are available from Boots, Tesco, Sainsbury’s, Asda, Waitrose, Morrison’s and pharmacies. If you are concerned about any symptoms that your baby may have please consult your doctor.

A Weekend Away, a Sick Child, and Mummy Guilt

There is so much I have to write about our anniversary weekend away in Paris. But first I need to start at the end of it. We were on the Eurostar home to London, not yet back on British tracks, and I said to Tony that we should go away for our anniversary every year. Just for one night. It had done us so much good. We felt so rested and like we’d had a proper break – not just one night away.

We hurtled through the channel tunnel and once we were on the other side, I called my mum to ask about the children. She was on her way to A&E with Milin.

The guilt hit me.

Milin was sick. He was going to hospital without his mummy.

I’d been cavorting round Paris with little more to worry about than whether to have pastries for breakfast, and I was now drinking wine and eating macaroons on the way home.

The last hour of the journey was unbearably slow. I went straight to the hospital while Tony went immediately home to Jasmin.

Milin had only been there since about 6pm and it was now 7pm. We spent the next few hours waiting to see a doctor. He alternated between having cuddles with me and being quiet, and playing relatively cheerfully with the truck and grabber we’d picked up for him at a market ten minutes from the EIffel Tower that morning.

“Mummy did you go on holiday?” He wanted to know about it.

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Jasmin, meanwhile, screamed for an hour for her mummy who still hadn’t come home to put her to bed.

Milin has a chest infection and he has been struggling to breathe. The official diagnosis is a viral-induced wheeze. We must give him an inhaler every few hours and he has some antibiotics he detests. He is, however, a million times better and brighter today.

I thought the guilt lessened as they got older. I thought I’d found ways to push it to the back of my mind. I was wrong.

Milin and I stayed in that hospital until close to 2am when I carried him out, half asleep, into the dark. He didn’t say a word, until we got home and he was sick all over the carpet next to his bed. Then he cried.

He’d been so good all evening. He’d been so brave.

And as I lay on the floor of his bedroom incase he struggled with his breathing again in his sleep, I went through again and again how he must have felt in the afternoon. He’d been unwell, feverish, chesty, and breathless. He’d not seen his mummy for a day and a night. I still wasn’t there.

The guilt never goes away, does it?

You can teach yourself to do things without them or send them out into the world for a little while. You can train yourself to avoid the mummy guilt by making little adjustments to the things you do and when you do them. You can talk yourself into believing you don’t feel bad.

This was mine and Tony’s first night away from our children.

The guilt was there, creeping into my sleep. How was Jasmin I had wandered? In her own cot? The guilt was there, when I watched other children going about their day with their parents. What were my two doing that moment?

Parenthood is about compromise – and this weekend has reminded me of that in a way that’s hurt me. It’s about accepting the guilt that comes with letting go a little. It’s about knowing you won’t be there every minute. It’s about not being able to shift the heavy heart that comes with being apart from your child when they ask for you.

Tony and I had a wonderful weekend in Paris. It was one night.

Milin was sick and he missed us.

No matter how many hours I think about this for, no matter how many times I acknowledge that we were not gone for long, that the children were ridiculously happy with my parents, in their own home, that I recognise that we were back very quickly after he became unwell… no matter – the guilt stays.

You can’t have it all. If you want to be you a little again one day, something has to give. And that will hurt and it won’t feel like a choice.

But this is the guilt that comes with wanting everything for your child without erasing yourself. This is the guilt that comes with with watching them grow a little on their own. This is the guilt that comes with being a mother.

It’s guilt combined with love and protection. It’s guilt combined with needing, maybe once in every four years, to be a little bit selfish on your wedding anniversary. And then wishing with all your heart you hadn’t been. It’s guilt combined with knowing that what you did will never change in the eyes of a little boy who wanted his mummy.

5 Films to Watch Before Visiting Paris

 

films to watch before visiting parisThere’s just something about Paris…

Romance, history, charm, gardens, architecture, shopping, cheese, wine, bookshops – there are so many reasons to love it.

And so, I’ve booked Tony and I a night in the city – without children – to celebrate our four-year wedding anniversary. I’ll post about our trip when we are back – but in the meantime I thought I’d share my five favourite films with their own French connection.

1. Betty Blue

I wonder if every teenage French student goes through a phase of being a little in love with Betty? I can remember the first time I saw this film – I loved everything about it – especially the sheer sexiness of it all. It got darker for me as I got older, and I struggle to watch it now without being horrendously sad, but it’ll always be one of my favourite films.

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2. Jules Et Jim

This for me is classic French cinema and Francois Truffaut at his most subtle best. There’s ,a  tragic love triangle, the story is broody, sad and tense – yet still immensely watchable.

julesetjim

3. Amelie

One of the sweetest films ever, surely. It’s whimsical romance is the perfect pre-Paris trip viewing. Our trip is a surprise for Tony so we’ve not watched this in ages – but when we’re back I’m going to make sure it’s the first thing we see together!

Amelie

4. Casablanca

Despite most of this film being set in Morocco, the shadow of Paris and what happened there hangs over the entire film. I loved watching this as a student for the drama, the action, the romance – and of course, this classic exchange was always my favourite bit:

Ilsa –  What about us?

Rick –  We’ll always have Paris. We didn’t have, we, we lost it until you came to Casablanca. We got it back last night.

Ilsa – When I said I would never leave you.

Rick – And you never will.

(Sorry, I couldn’t resist!)

Casablanca

5. Plein Soleil

OK, so once again not quite set in Paris. (Italy this time) But this early adaptation of the Talented Mr Ripley is just beautiful to watch. I saw this before seeing the later Hollywood film and before reading the book and I was captivated.  Lots of it is easy on the eye too…Plein SoleilAnd so there you have it – we’re off to Paris today, but we’ll be rewatching these when we’re back! If you’ve got anything else I should add to our viewing list, let me know! X

 

 

My Son Wants A Pet

Milin’s pet woodlouse is dead.

He had him for an afternoon. In fact, I was at work for the whole time their beautiful friendship lasted. I never saw the little insect alive.

But Milin loved him.

According to my mum, who looked after Milin and Jasmin today, the woodlouse was well cared for once the kids found him. They watched him for ages before Milin put him in a plastic container with a leaf.

The woodlouse died after Milin went to bed. Perhaps he got too thirsty. Perhaps he was old, who knows? In the morning though, we’ll have some explaining to do. My mum has come up with the best solution (she always does, she’s my mum.) She’s suggested we tell Milin that the woodlouse went to be with his mummy because he missed him. I think that’s a grand idea. It makes sense that a little woodlouse would want to be with his mummy doesn’t it?

Milin’s got lots of creatures who he wants to make into his pets these days. He loves that the fish are his pets – although I think he gets frustrated with them for not going anywhere or doing anything. The ants in the garden are his pets, as are the bees and any other creature he finds. He is constantly asking me, mummy, can I have a pet.

And so Tony and I have decided, tentatively, that if we ever get our own place one day (yes, that saga continues), maybe we will get a little family cat.

I’ve never had one, but I think we could manage it between us all.

It would make Milin so happy.It would give him a little creature to care for and protect. Tony grew up with a cat and would love any animal to be a part of our family. Jasmin will, I’m sure, think it’s the best thing ever too.

I’m not sure where the obsession has come from, but I think Milin’ll be a brilliant pet owner. He just wants a friend to look after, which I think is the loveliest thing. Milin the pet owner

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Stolen Sleep – With My Baby In My Bed

It’s become most nights now, that Jasmin spends some time in our bed.

It’s just happened in the last few weeks. And so I’m a tired, slightly frazzled, blurry version of the me who had got used to more sleep.

It’s a funny thing when they’ve been sleeping well. And then they just stop. There’s a part of me that wonders about being stricter than I am. It’s usually at around 6am when I have to drag myself up for another day that I consider whether I should have been firmer and had some resolve. Should I have left her crying in her cot? Should I have tried to settle her in her room instead of bringing her straight into our bed? Should I have got up as soon as she was fast asleep and carried her back to her room?

It’s only a small part of me that wonders this though.

It’s the same part that sometimes thinks I should be stricter at bedtime. Instead of sitting with her for as long as she wants until she falls asleep, instead of holding her in my arms, on my lap, until her eyes close… I wonder if I should put her in her bed and say goodnight, go to sleep, and close the door gently behind me.

Why don’t I do this? Jasmin is nearly 21 months old. She knows I’m not going to leave her forever, she should be able to put herself to sleep. Have I spoilt her? No. I don’t believe that responding to her cries in the way that feels right is spoiling.

Because, she is still my baby. Those precious cuddles while she still fits in my arms, while she still babbles away half awake and half asleep – they won’t last forever. The way she talks in her sweetest baby voice and turns my face to hers with her little hands so she can give me a kiss. One day she will be too big, she won’t want to sit with me all evening. One day she will talk in clear sensible words and won’t tell me endless stories about her day in a language no-one else can understand. She won’t turn my head to hers so her lips can meet mine.

And at night, when she wakes screaming (which, as I type while it is close to midnight, I am sitting waiting for her to do) I will go to her. One day she will sleep all night like Milin and not want at all to be in our bed. So for now, she can kick and poke me through those small hours. She can battle with my duvet and thrust her fingers in my mouth for comfort, her fingernails scratching my gums in my sleep. She can push me to the end of the bed and off my own pillow. She can curl her child’s body as close to mine as she can possible glue it so she knows I am there beside her.

One day, she won’t need to feel me next to her to sleep. I don’t know why she needs it suddenly now, but she is my baby. There won’t be so many more months that she will sprawl between us, her arms out wide when she is fast asleep, her curls around her face in a mess, her face so still finally. There won’t be so many more months when my sleep is broken almost each hour either by her calling out or moving or kicking or by me realising it’s time to move her back.

It’s a few hours a night mostly now. They are precious minutes stolen from sleep. We should both be asleep. But instead we are half awake and half aware of each other. We are together.

One day, in not so many months, she will think she needs me less, she will think she needs me more. But for now, while she thinks this is the only way it can be – well, I will listen. (And drink more coffee in the evenings.)

sleeping babies

(This photo by the way was just a few days ago – the only night I can remember when we have ever had both in our bed. Tony slept on the couch. I got a tiny strip down the edge. These two were in charge.)

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My Perfect Party Dress – by Jacques Vert Petite

I’ve just found the dress I’m going to be wearing again and again this summer. In fact, I’m so taken with the the Jacques Vert Petite Spot Tiered Soft Dress that I haven’t been able to wait for summer to wear it.

It got its first outing, complete with a wool black coat and a cashmere scarf, last month. I’m so pleased the weather has finally cheered up though so I can show it off properly on its next outing. Here’s a little peek at it on my birthday though – it was a freezing evening so I had to wrap up!

Jacques Vert petite spot tiered dress

I adore the length of this dress and it’s only because it’s from a petite range that it works so well on me. At 5 foot 2 inches, dresses can swamp me – so top marks to Jacques Vert for their line of petite dresses.

As soon as I lifted this dress out of the box I knew I’d have to wear it for my birthday party. It’s a gloriously soft, light fabric which hangs perfectly and I love the dots. I was initially a little worried about the tiered effect and how it would make me look, but actually it was incredibly flattering and hung really well. The little capped sleeves were super flattering too. (My upper arms are my least favourite area of my body and I hate having them on display!)
Jacques Vert petite dress

I loved the cowl neckline of this dress and was so refreshing to be wearing a smart, tailored dress that didn’t swamp my height or cling to any bumps. You can see why I’m going to get lots of wear out of it!

I’m already a Jacques Vert fan, and so when the team got in touch to tell me about the new range of petite dresses for spring summer 2015 I was delighted. Dresses are my absolute favourite wardrobe item, but if they’re not a petite cut, they don’t always work.

This dress though really does work. And it’s going to be a dress which comes out for weddings, summer garden parties and any semi-smart occasion I have coming up over spring summer 2015. It is so easy to wear and yet also definitely special – I felt really good in it, and any dress that makes you happy is a winner in my book.

jacques vert petite spring summer dress

For my birthday, I wore this dress with a coat and scarf because it was freezing, and I also wore flats. This is because Tony and I went for a drink along London’s South Bank in the afternoon, then walked (via the tube) to a restaurant in Hoxton and then headed on to a bar near Old Street tube. I needed the flats! (I did make sure to sit down lots with glasses of champagne though too!)

jacques vert dress

Everyone loved my dress and it was the perfect choice for a semi-smart evening with friends to celebrate my birthday. It saw me through drinks, dinner and more drinks, and while we were inside because of the weather, it would have been ideal for an outdoor party.

The dress comes with the most gorgeous flower pin which would look divine on its own on a black blazer with anything – even jeans. Or, equally, it would be the perfect pin on a shawl to cover up with on a summers evening at a party in this dress.

jacques vert flower

This dress is going to get another outing this weekend to somewhere very exciting. Make sure you’re following me on Instagram @kiranchug to see where! For now though, have another look at just how lovely this dress really is!

jacques vert petite spot dress

facebook-like-me-button1* I was sent this dress for the purpose of this review. All opinions and images my own.

 

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7 Things That Don’t Make Me A Bad Mum

While my husband and I drank a bottle of wine with some friends the other night, my three-year-old ran around the house with glee. It was nearly 9pm, he was getting to eat crisps with the grown-ups, and no-one had mentioned bedtime.

I looked at the little scene around me. We rarely have friends over for a meal. For Milin to be up past bedtime and hanging out with the adults happens even less frequently.

A younger me would have been fretting about how tired he would be the next day and how that would disrupt our routine. The new parent I once was would have hidden the salt and vinegar kettle chips out of reach of little hands.

But of course, things change as days and weeks and months pass. It’s not that you worry less or you care for them any less. It’s more that you start realising that the things you used to fret about weren’t necessarily the important bits.

My parenting doesn’t look anything like I thought it would. And I no longer mind. This is the reality of motherhood for me, and I accept that.

These days, there is less guilt about my failure to get a balanced diet into either child. There is less guilt about the amount of screen time they get. There is less guilt about the times I raise my voice. Crucially, there is also less guilt about the fact that often, I get stuff wrong.

And so, in the spirit of feeling less guilty about it all, here are a few things I’ve realised don’t make me, or anyone else, a bad mum.

1. I have really bad days where I’ve shouted at the kids before 7.30am and things don’t get much better from there. It’s taken me way too long to feel ok about this. But, I’ve got to the stage where I know it’s not always possible to take a deep breath and count to ten. Sometimes the words get shouted out in anger. I’m human.

2. I go to work some days. This is probably the hardest thing to accept about what life looks like right now. I’d give a great deal to be at home with my children every day until they start school. But the real world means I can’t. It doesn’t make me a bad person and it doesn’t mean my children are deprived or neglected.

3. Sometimes their hair starts to smell. Really. They hate having their hair washed and I’ve given up this battle. When it gets really bad, I get out the shampoo, the neighbours probably wonder if they should call for help, and I feel sad for these two little children who see a drop of water in their eyes as akin to torture. Nits apparently only like clean hair though, so I guess in some ways, I’m doing Milin and Jasmin a favour.

4. My three year old son can watch an entire movie on the iPad and I don’t stop him. I’ve given up trying to fill our afternoons with baking and crafting. Sometimes he needs time out, and if it’s after hours outside running around on the grass or playing on his bike, I think a bit of vetted screen time is ok.

5. I don’t feed them fish. Milin, 3, doesn’t eat meat. He’s only just started eating his first vegetable – cucumber. Put simply, they don’t have a balanced diet. Again, it’s a battle I’ve stopped fighting. I know they’ll eat better one day, and I’ll keep giving them the choice to eat better every day until then. While they’re putting on weight and happy and healthy, I won’t be worrying too much about the fact that a home-made organic balanced meal hasn’t passed their lips in a very, very long time.

6. I buy them too much stuff. They toys drive me a bit mad, they don’t fit into the toy boxes, they are never all put away, and there are far too many of them. I don’t believe my children need them, I don’t think I’m teaching them good lessons by making them think life is an endless dream of little gifts for no reason – but I also kind of like to spoil them. Plus, I’m weak and a sucker for a smile from my little ones.

7. Sometimes I wonder if 11am is too early for wine. I’ve not reached for it before lunch yet though, so I figure I’m doing ok.

There’s so much more, but those are probably the big things. They’re the things that once upon a time I would have beaten myself up over. But now, without my quite realising, the rules have relaxed a little and I think we’re all so much happier as a result.

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School Holidays in London

We didn’t get away this Easter. We had thought we might be moving house (we didn’t) and I had to work my usual days – so it meant we stayed close to home. It’s been two lovely weeks though, and, as the return to our term-time routine is just around the corner, I’ve been thinking today about how brilliant the break was.

Milin, who only started ‘big nursery’ in January, needed the rest. Tony was home from school and the kids love hanging out with him while I’m at work. Plus, on my days off we got loads of family time together to make the most of. Tony and I did try to do a bit of tag-teaming so we could both have the odd break, but we also did some lovely stuff together as a little group of four. Here are some of the highlights…

We spent a glorious sunny day exploring the Dinosaur Trail at Knebworth House just outside London. It’s such a brilliant attraction for the kids who think it’s amazing. We went with good friends and the kids all loved it, plus the beautiful historic house setting topped it all off.

woolly mammoth dinosaur trail knebworth House

We had a picnic and I finally feel like I’ve cracked what to take for the kids on days out that they will actually eat. It’s only taken three years!

We went to the adventure playground at Knebworth House too which was fantastic. Jasmin blew me away with her fearlessness and agility on the equipment. She’s come so far it’s unbelievable.

There were, of course, lots of playground visits this holidays. Friary Park is one of our local favourites and we spent a perfect morning here with friends before taking all four kids out for sushi. That wasn’t hugely successful, but the playground trip was. I love this shot of Milin and Jasmin – they really are best friends.

double swingOn one of my days off I had a lovely trip to London Zoo with the kids on my own. It made me realise how much they have grown up. I don’t think much now of doing an outing like that by myself with them, but I remember how hard just getting out of the door with both of them used to seem. The tough days really do pass, don’t they?

We saw our usual favourites – giraffes, monkeys, penguins and butterflies – but also saw the tiger and gorilla too.

London zoo penguinsBecause we’ve been so lucky with the weather we also spent a lot of time just hanging out in the garden. The kids love pottering with Tony in his shed and they’ve been working on a little garden of their own with him. They spent loads of time on the trampoline and Jasmin has finally started loving it, it’s so sweet.

There was also, of course, lots of stick hunting in the fields outside the back gate.

green walk

Sometimes simple photos like this make me a bit sad – they are growing up so fast…

But – it’s been a wonderful holiday. I worked, I missed them on those days so much – but we also had brilliant times too. It didn’t matter that we stayed close to home. We got out and had fun. Hope you all had a good break!

 

 

When a Flat Account Becomes a Joint Account

Tony and I have had a joint bank account for a very long time. Except that in the early years we used to call it our ‘flat account’.

It did everything a ‘joint account’ was meant to do. We paid our wages into it. We paid our bills from it by direct debit. We splashed out on holidays with it, bought the groceries with it, bought our lunches with it, bought our clothes with it, bought presents for each other with it – you get the idea.

But for ages we couldn’t bring ourselves to call it a ‘joint account’.

We’d set it up initially because it made sense for paying utilities bills when we started living together. Even though we used it for far more than just bills, calling it a ‘joint account’ signified some kind of step we hadn’t really taken. Or we hadn’t admitted that we had taken.

forever house

Both our names were on the mortgage, but we still couldn’t call it our joint account!

 

So while we still had our ‘flat account’ we bought a house, got married and had our first baby.

And of course, because babies have a habit of changing everything about the world around you, that’s when our flat account became our joint account.

We stopped referring to it as the kind of account 17-year-olds living away from home with strangers for the first time might have. We started to refer to it as a joint account because since our little family had grown, we had subconsciously accepted that there were no longer any lines marking out territory or possessions or feelings. Everything we owned, including the money in the bank (and the debt to the bank) was jointly ours. It was our little family’s.

In the last three and a bit years, I have left a middle management job and had two babies in the space of the 18  months. Tony left a freelance career to study teaching and become a teacher. We moved from New Zealand to London and sold a house along the way. I freelanced after my maternity leave ended and then started working in a new role part-time.

It’s been a big few years, and a few years in which our earnings have been all over the place. We have needed our joint account. It’s meant that in the gaps when one of us hasn’t been earning, it hasn’t mattered. It’s meant that neither of us has had to ask the other for money. It’s made planning our finances and future spending easier, because all our outgoings and incomings have been in the same place. It’s meant that when our earnings have been up and down, we’ve had the security and stability of one account we have always used.

I found stopping work and relying on someone else’s income hard when I had Milin. But the joint account made that transition easier for me because I knew it was an account I’d always contributed to in the past. It didn’t matter to me who had contributed more or most recently, but I just felt happier knowing that account had always been there for ‘us’ – and it would continue to be whether I was home with a baby or going out to work.

Milin made us realise that our flat account was a joint account. There was no fence around our separate earnings once we had our child. There was no differentiation between where the wages came in from. Our little boy changed everything, and he made us see how much of a unit we already were.

*This is a sponsored post. To read more about joint accounts with TSB, or find out about switching accounts, click here.

Let's Talk Mommy

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