Three things to be thankful for – the anti-Facebook version

There is more in my life to be thankful for than I could list. Look:

three things I'm thankful for

It’s a blurry, hurriedly snapped shot of Milin and Jasmin. They’re not looking at the camera or paying me any attention, because they’re so busy making mischief together. They’re laughing, loudly. I think you can almost tell. This is how they spend much of their time. Making each other laugh. Being best friends.

In the moments before I took this crooked, fuzzy, photo I realised I was sitting on the carpet mesmerised by how much fun they were having. They were, you could tell by their laughs, ridiculously happy. I snatched my phone to catch their joy.

When I looked at the photo later I once again realised how thankful I am to have two healthy, happy children. There is so much about our life that isn’t perfect, but there is also so much about it that is.

And then something made me think of the current Facebook game to list three things a day for three days that you are thankful for. A wonderfully lovely friend thought of me a few weeks ago and tagged me to take part. I did, for one day only. Which, according to the unwritten rules, is getting it wrong.

I looked at this photo of Milin and Jamsin just after I took it and wondered whether I should start my three days again, starting with this shot, and writing how thankful I am they are so happy and healthy.

I decided not to.

I only played the Facebook game for one day  – but not because I forgot to continue, and not because I couldn’t think of three things every day. No, there were other reasons.

There is so much in every day that I have to be thankful for. If I was to sit down and think about it at the end of each day though, I’d struggle to narrow down my list to three points. I don’t want to cut out the rest of the good stuff. And I also don’t want to ignore the bad.

There are also a whole lot of things in  each day that I don’t want to sing to the world about. There is a whole lot about each day that I want to cry about and stamp my feet about and whinge about because life is so bloody unfair really, isn’t it? That’s not the kind of list you want to see in your Facebook feed though, I’m guessing.

I’m not writing a list of three things every day because I don’t want to airbrush my days into a few neat bullet points which tell you all how happy I am about life. (I am, by the way, generally happy about most of it.) Instead, I’ll keep posting status updates telling you how crap it is that Jasmin is teething. And I’ll keep tweeting about my utter frustration that Milin won’t go to sleep. I’ll keep Instagraming drunk photos too, just in case you haven’t seen enough glasses of wine through a soft filter this evening. And I might occasionally Pin something too, but I’m usually not perfect enough to remember to aspire to pretty things or a more stylish existence.

Telling you three things about my day that I’m thankful for would leave out a hundred other good things. It would also leave out a hundred other bad things that I’m not thankful for, and I probably just want to forget about.

So I’m not playing the game. I’m just not into shouting only about the good stuff. But if you are, ignore me and keep it coming – I love seeing what has made you happy today.

ordinary moments


 photo 93142f35-6d39-479f-b3de-d94dbca68162_zps58499252.jpg

13 Comments on Three things to be thankful for – the anti-Facebook version

  1. Leigh Kendall
    August 2, 2014 at 9:14 pm (3 years ago)

    Great post. I recently took part in this exercise – I’m at a point in my life where detailing even three positive things a day has done me a lot of good. I wrote a post about this very thing yesterday. I’ve also found it refreshing to see a timeline with more positives and fewer gripes – and been bemused when I’ve seen nominated folks not knowing where to start when having to find positives. You’re right, though – life isn’t all positive and I also reserve the right to use Twitter (and my blog) to talk about how things really can be so bloody unfair xxx

    Reply
    • kiranchug
      August 2, 2014 at 9:23 pm (3 years ago)

      Leigh, I thought of you when I wrote this – in fact, when I wrote that life could be ‘bloody unfair’. Not because I understand or can imagine for a second just how unfair it is – but because it also somehow feels wrong for me to write about three wonderful things every day. does that make sense? But, thanks for making me think about another side – that detailing the positive is doing something good, and that it is refreshing to see in a timeline. I’m going to hunt out your post now. xxx

      Reply
      • Leigh Kendall
        August 2, 2014 at 9:36 pm (3 years ago)

        Bless you, I’m touched that you thought of me when you wrote that. It does make sense about thinking about only three positive things in a day. It’s wonderful – and refreshing – to know that you don’t take your blessings for granted, which I feel so many do. Lots of love xxx

        Reply
  2. donna
    August 2, 2014 at 9:57 pm (3 years ago)

    This is such a lovely post. I too have so many individual things in my life that I am thankful for but they all blur into one life, with my little family, a contented little unit and I am thankful for every single aspect of that. Thanks for sharing x

    Reply
  3. PottyMouthedMummy
    August 3, 2014 at 9:16 am (3 years ago)

    Fab post lovely. It’s true. Sometimes I look at some people’s social media feeds and it is all far too air brushed to possibly be real. I love seeing people have beautiful moments with the crap. And for me I am wary of only posting good all the time, I don’t like to seem smug. But on the whole (work aside) I do love my life and my two guys.

    This post really made me think lovely xx

    Reply
  4. Carie
    August 3, 2014 at 11:28 am (3 years ago)

    This is beautifully put – we have a tradition that before each meal we go around the table and say what we’re thankful for so that’s four things for every grace – I’d never manage to condense it into three things a day and as you say it takes away from the wonderful hotchpotch of the everyday ordinary; the good and the bad.

    Reply
  5. Jenny
    August 3, 2014 at 5:52 pm (3 years ago)

    Greatly put and I love the photo. Fuzzy and happy and not looking at the camera and all! It’s perfect and you are absolutely right about this. Its so amazing to watch them be so happy and loving together as siblings. And to pick just three things for three days well I just couldn’t either. Too much to be grateful for indeed! Lovely post. #ordinarymoments

    Reply
  6. Nikki Thomas
    August 4, 2014 at 8:52 am (3 years ago)

    So true. I haven’t done this either for similar reasons. I have so much to be thankful for, but some very sad stuff going on too. That’s life though isn’t it?

    Reply
  7. Becky | Spirited Puddle Jumper
    August 4, 2014 at 1:50 pm (3 years ago)

    Love this photo! I will happily post good and bad things on fb, although I think the idea of posting 3 positive things is a nice one- I think sadly far too many people are so negative when they have loads going for them and their families. When I’ve had a shitty day, I really try at the end of it to think of as many good things in my life/happened that day as possible, as it brings me back down to earth. My two were MONSTERS this weekend, but we managed to salvage a pants Sunday with an impromptu-way-past-bedtime- sunny trip to the park, I was then able to add something good to my ‘list’! Sometimes it’s about making the mental effort, no matter how hard it can feel sometimes. x

    Reply
  8. Iona@Redpeffer
    August 4, 2014 at 8:13 pm (3 years ago)

    Oh I’m totally with you on this-each and every day is made of it’s own highs and lows, happiness and frustration. I don’t want to condense them into sound bites of ‘thankfulness’ or otherwise. Life is much more complex than this, in every sense. But I enjoy seeing others thoughts and feelings nonetheless.

    Reply
  9. Louisa
    August 5, 2014 at 2:31 pm (3 years ago)

    Such a wonderful post. I agree wholeheartedly with you. Sometimes life is great and you have lots of things to be thankful for, other days life is just a bit pants. I don’t want to condense my life in 3 sound bites that would exclude a great deal of what my day was about. #whatsthestory

    Reply
  10. Katie @mummydaddyme
    August 5, 2014 at 3:08 pm (3 years ago)

    ‘There is so much about our life that isn’t perfect, but there is also so much about it that is.’ This totally sums up how I feel about mine too Kiran. It isn’t perfect but I have a hell of a lot to be thankful for. Thank you for this post. x

    Reply

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