Reality checks for parents

If I ever need a reality check, I can rely on my children to provide.

They did just that today, for example, when I was having a ‘very important meeting’ at work about ‘very important things’. Then I got a phone call saying my toddler son had just bitten my daughter’s foot.

They also served up a decent dose of reality last time I tried to fit in a sneaky bit of internet shopping while they were reading books together. The sound of pages being torn out of a book will quickly distract me from a pretty bag, it turns out.

Then there’s the discussion about what the contents of a potty look like. “Look Mummy, it’s a snail today.” These discussions have a habit of reminding me that no matter how advanced I think my toddler is, he still finds poo fascinating.

There’s the reality check that comes from seeing my kids spitting out my homemade organic chicken mince burgers but then wolfing down a bowl of plain buttery eating at highchair

There’s my son’s refusal to wear anything remotely ‘on-trend’ because he’s got a T-shirt with Thomas the Tank Engine on it and actually, who needs any other clothes?

There’s the smearing of marmite fingers over my dress 30 seconds before I’m due to leave the house for work.

There’s crawling away (at speed) from the nappy changing mat before being wiped. 15 seconds before I’m due to leave the house for work.

There is the complete refusal to participate in my Pintrest-inspired craft activity because making  a tower with blocks is more fun.

There’s the very sudden mood change that comes quicker than you or I could flick a switch. There’s the rapid escalation of something not being quite right to it being the worst thing in the world ever.

There’s the temporary refusal to forgive me for not being there by his side the second he slipped in the park. That one leaves a dull ache somewhere in my chest.

There’s the screaming in the middle of the night that goes on four hours because I can’t make the pain of teething go away.

There is the little voice which says ‘Mummy, please put your phone away and play with me.’ There is nothing like that, I tell you, to make you promise to yourself that the emails can wait.

But then, there are other reality checks too.

There is the reality check which shows me what is really important. When I miss a doctor’s appointment or forget to fill in the nursery form – there is the joy in a little boy’s face because we played trains instead.

There is the intense, desperate, needy 2.30am cuddle when only mummy will do – and then the instant calm and return to slumber because mummy was there.

The smiles, the laughter, the snippets of too-funny conversations – these are the reality checks that make me happy, every day. For them, I’ll take the real world.toddler fireman sam hat


21 Comments on Reality checks for parents

  1. Mel
    October 8, 2014 at 12:17 am (3 years ago)

    Quite simply beautiful, Kiran… You have such a well-worded way of describing motherhood. X

  2. Vikki Holness
    October 8, 2014 at 8:24 am (3 years ago)

    This post resonates with me completely, there’s so much i love about motherhood but you definitely have to take the rough with the smooth sometimes. Having said that, the good moments certainly outweigh the bad ones, making it all worthwhile! xxx #sharewithme

  3. Notmyyearoff
    October 8, 2014 at 8:41 am (3 years ago)

    Ahhh that’s really lovely, I remember the nappies 15 seconds before work too and even now it can take forever to get into the car. And the cuddles at 2am are still awesome when they’re cuddling you in bed. Lovely post.

  4. Sarah MumofThree World
    October 8, 2014 at 8:45 am (3 years ago)

    So many of these are familiar! And there’s a good reason (other than that I’m a crap cook) that I don’t make proper food too often for kids – last night’s potato waffles, veggie sausages and beans vanished in minutes, but homemade chicken curry and rice will be pushed round the plate for an hour and a half, accompanied by pleas of ‘Id that enough yet?’.

  5. ToInfinityAndIVF
    October 8, 2014 at 9:02 am (3 years ago)

    Popping over from Share With Me, Lovely post 🙂

  6. Becky | Spirited Puddle Jumper
    October 8, 2014 at 9:10 am (3 years ago)

    I found myself nodding along to this the whole way through! Nothing like 2 toddlers to bring you back down to earth with a bump! x #sharewithme

  7. seychellesmama
    October 8, 2014 at 9:40 am (3 years ago)

    This is amazing. All of this is so true, which makes me sad and so happy all in one go. There really are such highs and lows with being a mum and there is certainly nothing like our kids to give us a reality check! xx

  8. Helen Porter
    October 8, 2014 at 1:10 pm (3 years ago)

    I completely relate to this just this morning my four year old thought that asking what happens when you die was more interesting than hurrying up and eating his breakfast because we were late for school! ………love this post it made me laugh as well as think about my own boys #sharewithme

  9. Honest mum
    October 8, 2014 at 1:50 pm (3 years ago)

    Really touched me, (as with all your posts) motherhood really is the rough with the smooth but it’s so wonderful to love unconditionally and have that reciprocated, even if it involves 4 hours of relentless teething induced tears, we’ve had that here too, hugs x

  10. Sam
    October 8, 2014 at 2:17 pm (3 years ago)

    Beautifully put Kiran! It’s true, no matter how sophisticated we try to be they know how to keep it real!! I love it when no one except mummy will do too – nothing in the world like that surge of love. X #sharewithme

  11. Iona@redpeffer
    October 8, 2014 at 6:52 pm (3 years ago)

    Absolutely spot on. I used to need a couple of hours to prepare for meetings etc, these days I’m lucky if I get 2 minutes. But I wouldn’t change it for the world x

  12. Life at the Little Wood
    October 8, 2014 at 9:16 pm (3 years ago)

    So, so true Kiran, and beautifully put. I love that these realities make us so much more selfless and move our focus too. My children have definitely made me a better person! Loved reading this xx #sharewithme

  13. Katrina
    October 8, 2014 at 9:46 pm (3 years ago)

    Oh K, I’m nodding along & laughing, yet getting all teary too!! This was such a wonderful post. It’s so easy in life to loose perspective, & it’s the smallest, most ordinary little things which can bring us back to reality……even if it is what todays ‘poop’ resembles the look of most hehehe xx (kids say the funniest things!!)

  14. Wicked World of Lucas
    October 9, 2014 at 5:21 am (3 years ago)

    What a great post. Many of these are oh so familiar but you’ve written it great as you’ve really managed to make me smile to #sharewithme

  15. kidGLloves
    October 9, 2014 at 5:23 am (3 years ago)

    Grace says – YEP!! Did most of them and I think Mummy fl the same way you did – although I have never actually bitten anyone’s foot before……….
    Lucas says – Poo looking like a snail?? Genius!
    The Mothers say – Great post. We were nodding as we read every single point you made. Please remember we have a mini creations linky every Wednesday so if you have do some crafty activities with your kids, we’d love for you to link up 🙂

  16. ghostwritermummy
    October 9, 2014 at 2:05 pm (3 years ago)

    I LOVE this post! And I am glad its not just my kids that analyse their poo too! My favourite so far has been the likeness to sausages… 😀
    x x x

  17. Jenny
    October 9, 2014 at 3:05 pm (3 years ago)

    I couldn’t agree more, kids are always there to be blunt and keep it real. Making us know what’s more important. I love this. Thank you so much for linking up to Share With Me #sharewithme

  18. Mummy Bear
    October 9, 2014 at 8:52 pm (3 years ago)

    Beautifully written Kiran, and spot-on. So many points that found me nodding my head in reconigition. I especially like the ‘Look it’s a snail today’ comment. Show me a parent who hasn’t been brought back down to earth with an almight bump with THAT one… 😉 #ShareWithMe


1Pingbacks & Trackbacks on Reality checks for parents

  1. […] must-read for parents everywhere from Kiran at Mummy Says. Just in case you needed a reality check… and watch out for the snail reference! […]

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